WANTED: True JOY For This Mom

October 13, 2016 by Reuben & Joan Penelope Acosta 5 Comments

Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!– Philippians 4:4 NIV

As I write this I’m secretly hoping that most moms with young children can fully relate to me.

Confession: During downtime, social media has made me an amateur stalker. And the profiles I love viewing? Those that share about their families– activities done, trips, schools, how hashtag-super-blessed life is and more. I usually end up feeling envious at all the blessed hashtags. Plus I lose a huge chunk of my time.

Now let me tell you about my most recent, eventful days, which was yesterday and today.

Yesterday, I was sleepless due to shortness of breath & persistent coughing. I was brought to the emergency room of my favorite hospital & was diagnosed with suspected asthma triggered by a nasty viral flu. I came home and couldn’t move, couldn’t eat, couldn’t BE normal! Rachel’s sick too and hubby was just about to recover from the flu. A note of appreciation to Reuben for being our super nurse the whole day in spite of his own weakened condition. And thanks to missionary nurse Grace for accompanying me in the E.R.

But…

Today I woke up with husband already missing. He went to seminary very early because he just couldn’t miss another day of class. No breakfast. House needed to be cleaned because you know, two days worth of dust & asthmatics cannot co-exist. Still not fully ok physically but I have no choice. Need to slowly, painstakingly prepare meals at the right time for me & Rachel, administer our medications on time, do laundry (huge thank YOU to God for automatics!), sweep the floor, clear stuff away. For Rachel’s entertainment so mommy can do the chores, Kiddie video was on almost the entire day. Sigh. That choice almost undid me because of the guilt for exposing my not-yet-two toddler to too much screen time. But I needed grace. Loads of it. Today. And for everyday, in fact. Hubby comes home to wifey whose first meaningful question was, Why did you leave without checking on us first? He has an explanation. I question its validity. We dropped the topic to save energy for our nightly routines.This is called choosing your battles wisely, by the way. I figured, since I survived this day, let’s move on quickly. 

So this is my current reality. There’s not a lot of instagram or facebook moments to choose from. Case in point: see pic below. The daily grind of house chores and childcare is all there is, for now.

Reviewing my struggles above made me realize, I need to be kinder to myself. How to do this? Breathe deeply. Lower expectations. Radically reduce time on newsfeeds. Most important of all, spend daily time with God through study, reflection, meditation and/or journalling, a.k.a. Blogging.

Could these actually uplift my daily reality? Well, family’s needs will always be here, sicknesses come and go, chores are routine, tasks always call for attention, budget is constrained. But with that one non-negotiable, precious connection with God as a daily constant, I can have time to address my heart issues, lift the burdens to Him, ask for much-needed grace and strength, and most importantly, receive His supply of joy and purpose for the day.

To be honest, I cannot wait for joy to come on my next instagram-worthy moment. My joy has to have a simple reason for being present. It has to be God put in the center of my day because He is the source of true joy. I need to ask Him daily for His joy to fulfill my calling for this season: to be a housewife and full-time mom, with a little ministry to others bound in a home-setting.

Pray with me, fellow mom?

“Father, I acknowledge that You are the true source of joy. I surrender my daily realities to You. I confess that I have lost many days to thanklessness and purposelessness. Yet, You still pursue my heart by constantly calling out my name amidst all the inner noise surrounding it. Thank You, my persistent Pursuer! Please step into my callings in this season of life and reclaim the throne. Breathe in fresh life, meaning and JOY into them! And use me with all my humble offerings to encourage others in their own faith journeys. In Christ’s precious name, amen.”